A Little Humor

It is a known fact between my mother and I that we will inevitably have some type of catastrophe or mishap when we travel any distance over an hour. Over the years, she and I have had many ups and downs, but we have had some of the most hilarious and strange trips together as well. So, I want to just share a quick story with you.

I lost my father in 1995 and we were contacted by the family’s lawyers regarding a deposition. We had to travel to the law office which was located in Ft. Lauderdale. I was so excited to be going back to Florida, even though it was still painful thinking about my father.

It was the summer and as expected, the weather was hot. We listened to music as we rode singing and rapping to the lyrics of Mad Lion, TLC, KRS-One, and Boyz-2-Men. We stopped and ate at fast food spots, got drinks and gas at convenience stores, and rested at rest areas. Everything was going as planned and we were, as my mother said “making good time”. When we reached Florida, we were both hungry for a sit down meal so we pulled into Ryan’s Steakhouse.

We hopped out Mustang and began our walk across the scorching hot parking lot. As we walked, I began to notice people looking at us strangely. I wondered what the issue was. I looked down and noticed my shoe was untied so, I stopped to secure the strings. I ran to catch up to my Mother and she said “It’s cool out here. I feel a breeze.” I did not. I happened to catch a man looking at my mom’s rear end and I followed his eyes to her bottom as well . Mommy’s entire a#$ was out. Her shorts had somehow torn down the seam and her pink Hanes briefs were in full view. I began to laugh hysterically. Mommy still did not know what was going on—that is until she reached back and felt her behind!!!

“Oh my goodness! My whole butt is out!!” She screamed in horror, while I convulsed in laughter. After I got myself together we walked to the car. We went to a local store where Mommy bought a new outfit and threw the old one in the trash. We have laughed about this many times down through the years and this is just one of many travel stories we have.  I never will forget that outfit or the view in the Ryan’s parking lot.

Peace & Blessings,

Andréa The Tru Lioness 

Writers Block

     Peace and blessings fam! I am suffering right now with something I thought would never happen---writers block. As I sit here and stare at the screen, I realize that my creativity is being blocked by life and I cannot allow this to continue. Writing, drawing, painting, singing, dancing, every "artsy" aspect of life has been my life for as long as I can remember, I created my first mural on paper my mother was given from her job at the local school. I drew with various colored chalks an underwater scene--my very own world under the sea, complete with sea horses, sea turtles, sharks, and all. I wrote my first poem at age 5 or 6. It was all about my red wagon and the books I loved to read. And Mommy always told me that I danced in her belly the entire time! Dance is so freeing!! But now the words seem to be caught up at the end of my pen and the inspiration has flown away like a bird heading South for the winter. I do not feel like inspiring others, I have no witty stories or anecdotes, I have no words of wisdom, and it is killing my spirit. 
      But, what I am realizing is that when one's heart is in pain and Sun doesn't seem to shine as brightly, your creativity can be held up. I realize that I am only human and only one individual. I have a terrible habit of putting more on my plate than I could ever eat, but at least I have identified this as an issue. Once upon a time, I would never, ever, ever admit that I was overdoing anything, overwhelmed, or over-extended. I would work 16 hour shifts, run errands for mom, go and read books at my son's school, and still hang with my sisters after hours. But today is a new day. I know I cannot do all things. But, I still struggle with saying no and I digress.
       So, at this point in time, I am feeling absolutely uninspired and I know why but now I must determine what course of action I need to take. I have always been a reader and lately I have been reading a book written by Queen Afua named "Sacred Woman". That book has certainly given me a new perspective on my situation. Remember, knowledge without application is not helping anything. So, I am learning about how a woman's womb is directly connected to her creativity as well as her heart. I am also learning how important my heart is to my creative process so, I am getting back to basics. Meditation, healthy eating, exercise, affrimations, dance all have been helpful in the past. 
        We have to find our peace within our situations and life and we cannot allow circumstances to stall our progress into greatness. I am saying "we" because I have to remind myself of the same thing daily. Negativity gives birth to self doubt, decreases our confidence, and incapacitates our creative stream. Negativity can be a cancer but we have the solution. Keep moving!! I see greatness in the future. Can you see it?




Peace,
Andre'a The Tru Lioness

Discouragement and Enlightenment

Peace and blessings fam!

I hope my words find you in a state of peace. Finding peace in this world as it stands is a difficult task. As for me, I have been having difficulties managing and balancing all of my responsibilities. I am a perfectionist by nature and when things do  not go as I plan them, I become discouraged. It causes me to feel disconnected and depressed. This time of change is different though. This time , the trials have caused me to "see" my life and those involved more clearly and not all of it is pleasant. 

I am seeing people's true intentions towards me and I am having to end relationships with some because they have been misusing and abusing our connection. It is painful but necessary. I am also seeing my own flaws and that is also not easy. It is quite painful. People have a hard time acknowledging the character flaws we all have but the older that I become, the more I realize that self-realization is necessary for growth and progress. I look in the mirror and see who I am but more importantly, who I am to become. We have to learn to accept ourselves for who we are and work on being a better "ME". I read somewhere that life is not about growing up but growing in, growing into who we were created to be. Self-actualization is an enlightening experience. I am much stronger that I ever thought. And so are you. We are capable of so much more than we can imagine. Circumstances do not dictate your greatness. Keep moving forward! I am.......

One Love, 

Andre'a The Tru Lioness

Revolution

Peace and blessings to all!
On this journey of mine, I have seen, heard, and experienced much but what is now becoming more and more apparent, is the fact that the revolution has not come to fruition yet because the people have not revolutionized their minds. When one begins to speak about revolution, people in to think of guns, blood, and death and that is partly true. I will not sit here and say that any revolution that has occurred, such as the Haitian revolution , occurred without bloodshed. It most certainly did and it is necessary for people to attain the freedom they so desire. But, before that part of the revolution occurs, the people must have a total change of mind. The mind is a powerful thing. It has the ability to create our universe. But, until we can actually "see" ourselves free, we will not have it. Our people are slave to the ideals of our slave ancestors. They have lost all knowledge of self and any inkling of desire to be self sufficient. They are fearful of change and do not see any value in nation building or even having cultural pride unless it is Black History Month.
I am pleased over some of my brothers and sistars awakening and sharing knowledge but we must continue to push for more to awaken. We have to make every effort that we can to unify the people as well as unity is necessary for revolution. The task is arduous but it is a matter of life and death. Our children, their children, and all of our descendents deserve more . They deserve to be free and we should not look to the next generation to fight this fight. We are more than capable!

Ase'

One last thought, in the words of Fred Hampton, "Why don't you live for the people? Why don't you struggle for the people? Why don't you die for the people?

Life Lessons

This past week has been one of extreme stress, loss, pain, death, and tension. Although not all of the incidents happened to me personally, they all affected me greatly. Let me begin by telling you a little about me. I am a sponge that soaks up the emotions and vibes of others. Being this way at times has served me well, especially when the individual was in need of an encouraging word, a hug, an ear, a shoulder---I am naturally a nurturer. But, being this way can be very taxing on me spiritually and emotionally.  I sat and thought about where my life is headed and where it currently rests and have come to realize that the life cycle is very cyclical in nature, as is the universe and in order to move from the current wavelength, I have to master the lesson at hand.

When I was growing up, my grandmother used to tell me that if you “travel the same dirt road, you will end up at the same place”. She was so right! In reviewing my life currently, I realize that in some areas in life, I have not progressed because I have traveled the same road. I felt unlucky, used, stupid, all at the same time but, none of those things hold true. I have been misguided and simply needed to change paths.

Life itself is a series of events, some beautiful, some scary, some painful, some mundane. And with life, there will be lessons that each of us must master before progressing to the next level in life. The tricky thing is when you are living life, is the fact that the lesson is learned after the event, almost in what we see as reverse. But, as we navigate, we must analyze each situation and not only see the lesson but apply the outcome.  Now, you are probably thinking: what lesson did she learn? Well, I learned that in matters of the heart, always follow your gut instinct about a person, you should only allow a person once to correct a major issue, repetitive benefits of the doubt are a sham, and always identify and address red flags. If I had only read the writing on the wall, I would not be in this predicament. But, again, now I know and to know is to be free. Mastering a lesson provides peace of mind, even if you are not totally free of the situation, and to have peace is be powerful.  

Ase’

Andre’a “The Tru Lioness

Unsympathetic....

This morning, I saw a brief summary of a situation that a white man is going through that truly made me think and in turn, of course, write. Basically, he is dating or married to a Sistar. Now they want to have a child. He works in a restaurant and while at work , he enjoys playing music. Apparently he was listening to some rap music and someone he works with mentioned “Niggers, that’s what they say all the time right? Nigger this, nigger that.” Well, this white man was offended and is thinking of taking some type of action against the individual.  I know you are probably thinking that I would say that we should boycott the restaurant or take some action to bring this racist to light, however, I am thinking something a little deeper.

Would the guy be as offended if he was not involved with a Sistar? Would he have defended an Afrikan stranger against the same type of abuse? What has he done to effectively combat and address racism as it exists in his community? I can answer for him. The answer is a resounding no. I will take it a step further and say that he has heard white people call Afrikans nigger before and it probably did not bother him , not until he had a Queen on his arm and is considering having a baby with her.

What White Amerikkka needs to understand is that we are not going to be sympathetic if you only show interest when the issue at hand is dealing with your personal issue. We need you to give a damn ALL THE TIME—not just when it inconveniences or hurts you. Your sympathy is not needed. If you really want to help out this racial issue in this country, how about challenge your people to deal with us fairly. How about asking the school system to change its policies when dealing with our children? How about lobbying for our people to get reparations that are so justly owed to us? How about providing resources for us to establish our own sustainable communities? Work with us for the greater cause for ALL of us-not just when it affects the one you love!

The racial divides and the oppressiveness of the systems in place in this country and abroad is deplorable.  We are significantly under-education, mis-educated, victimized, murdered, etc. We are told to “forget”, “to move on”, to “let the past go”. We are blamed for our condition when our condition is a direct result of the atrocities of the past. I could go on and on and on about what was done and how we are still suffering from “post slavery syndrome” but, I will not.

I do challenge white people who claim to care about our condition and who are not blind to the injustices that they see to stop being complacent and be truthful about their position. No you do not own slaves, but you benefit from the wealth that slaves built. Having a “black” friend does not mean you are not racist—face it! Stop feeling like Afrikan people should “move on”. Do you ask Jews to forget Hitler? And most of all, when you see injustice, do not be so quick to assume the Afrikan is guilty of something to cause this to befall them. Do  your part! Stop pretending to be “legally blind” every time you see the people being done wrong and encourage your people to do the same. Realize that the Amerikkka that you know is NOT the Amerikkka that truly exists.

Hotep,

Andre’a The Tru Lioness 

Lately, I have had some very interesting conversations with Sistars on their relationships. And what I have seen is that their situations mirror my own  life in many ways. They are dealing with men who refuse to acknowledge their feelings. The men continue the same behavior thus leaving the woman feeling disappointed, hurt, and betrayed. I have had to realize that I am speaking to myself when I provide them insight on how I view the situation. Relationships are tricky things and have periods similar to high tide at the beach, highs and lows. What we have to do is learn to ride the waves. But, there also lies the decisions that can be most difficult--is this relationship worth it?

I was married for 7 years and was with my husband for a total of 10 years-- a whole decade. In retrospect, I realize I shortchanged myself ; denied myself the things that I needed as a woman--affection, attention, and most of all, genuine love. I had to come to the conclusion that I was merely a convenience to this man and that at the end of the day, our marriage was a farce, a beautiful illusion, complete with children, family van, and holiday fare. I lost who I was trying to please him. Once I decided I was done, I began to see with different eyes. I realized that a relationship is not supposed to drain you, it should enrich your life. It is the deepest of partnerships.

So, when I hear how much pain my Sistars are in, when I hear the depth of love they have for their men--it pains me. What our community lacks is strong, black families and I for one, hate to see us disjointed. But, a Sistar should not deny her feelings and the man she is with, should acknowledge those feelings. I feel that if your mate truly wants to be with you, they will do whatever is required. When you love, you love purely and the happiness of your mate becomes of the utmost importance. Will there be disagreements? Most certainly. However, the "hot button" issues will be laid aside and the level of consideration will be present.

Sistars, I implore you to search your heart and be strong enough to walk away if that man is not the King for you. Brothas, I implore you to soul search. If this is the Queen that you desire, treat her as such. We need each other. Anything other than unity would be uncivilized.


Peace & Blessings,
Andre'a